New pier Durban South Africa

numb

there were times I sought refuge in my blog as I fought the sorrow of being without you. 

I had lost my inspiration, my muse, I was lost my soul, it lay bare,

there were times I would seek refugee in reading poetry, and there were times it spoke to me,

I couldn't put pen to paper and pour out my heart, I was too numb

I found solace in other poets sorrows, or hope in their words.

I want to share some poems with you, some are sad, some inspirational, 

forgive me for portraying others writings but the words are beautiful.

Clenched Soul by Pablo Neruda

We have lost even this twilight.
No one saw us this evening hand in hand
while the blue night dropped on the world.

I have seen from my window
the fiesta of sunset in the distant mountain tops.

Sometimes a piece of sun
burned like a coin in my hand.

I remembered you with my soul clenched
in that sadness of mine that you know.

Where were you then?
Who else was there?
Saying what?
Why will the whole of love come on me suddenly
when I am sad and feel you are far away?

The book fell that always closed at twilight
and my blue sweater rolled like a hurt dog at my feet.

Always, always you recede through the evenings
toward the twilight erasing statues.

i carry your heart with me by E. E. Cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

This poem always inspired me during those long lonely times without knowing your love or your voice, it was what helped me keep on hoping that we would again be together

always love her

                                                       Love her when she least deserves it,
                                                    because that's when she needs it the most.

The endless road

The endless road

As I travel down that dusty road not knowing where it will lead

Fraught with pain and heartache I waver in my step

Mind reeling as foot falls upon the stony path

Looking back as I pause in my stride

The road has no beginning and there seems to be no end

The warmth in my heart stays my course

And at each daybreak I find myself wandering

Again on the endless path,

Yet there in the distance I see the end

And she is with me stepping beside me

And the beginning has no more weight

Only what lies ahead is our new beginning

Her every new kiss is the first kiss to me

She speaks to me under my feet all day,

She sings to my dreams all night

And I find myself wanting her

I had always carried her in my heart

I had never left her and now realise

She had never left me either

My mind always drifts to you

I just can't get you out of my head no matter how hard I try

power of love

I feel her in every breath

I feel her in every breath,

On every drop of rain,

I feel her in the rays of the sun

Warming me to the core

I hear her voice on the wind

Calling out to me

I taste her upon my lips

Kisses by the bounty offered

She comes to me in my dreams

Completing my shattered heart

I catch her scent in the mornings

Of promises yet to come

Tenderly she touched my heart

And charged into my life

My mind enveloped by her thoughts

Brings hope and light again

I see you there in the distance

you are so near I only need to reach

soon my love we will hold each other

not fleeting nor in a dream

but to tremble within our loving embrace

I will come to you to be at your side

hidden behind the mask

Behind the masks we hide

Revealing a glimpse of the truth

There are no lies only hidden truths

Hidden behind the masks we grow

Bold and tall we appear to all

As we perceive ourselves

Behind the masks we hide

The hurt and uncertainty erode

Only the mask is shown

As we hide behind the face

That is not ours but for those to see

Our hearts feel the truth

The mask unable to hide what lies within

Behind the masks we hide

But we sense what is there

You cannot hide it from me

Only the mask is seen

Our hearts are felt

And behind the mask we hide

Shown to each other

Yet others cannot see

Hidden behind the masks

We are revealed to each other

And we are complete

Hidden by the mask from others

without a touch, only a whisper

a whisper an echo of your words spoken,

they roam the halls of my memory 

that is the only thing that I can lay claim to,

I cannot feel your touch nor the taste of your lips

feel your heated breath or warmth of your flesh,

I have only dreamed you to me, 

no touch can I lay claim to 

yet I tremble with the need at the sound of your voice

your words roam the halls again 

lifting the shuffled heel and adding spring to the step

frozen moments in time, created and captured in those hallowed halls

the ghost of wishes and dreams gone past, replaced by the present 

revived again with renewed vigor, this time much stronger

distance but a word that strengthens patience  

what we will share, the future ours to shape

lean on me I am yours

You can’t be an island unto yourself

It will break you; the loneliness will eat you up

Love me with every fibre within you

Need me to share with you your happiness

Share your sorrows and quiet moments

Because sharing with you means just being there for you

The quiet strength in knowing that I’m there

Lean on me, need me, allow me to be your rock

Your staff your shield the one you can turn to in need.

Consume me and allow me to consume you

Beat me, hurt me, sound off on me, rent out your anger

Grow to trust in me again, I will not hurt you,

I stand and watch the struggle within you

I see how it tears at you how it torments you

And although we who love you become the object of your wrath

We take it in silence and understanding, with patience

I want you to blossom and bloom again

To be my delight and joy, the light in my life

I beckon to you to come out and heal

Because without your healing I will remain broken

Your love to me is my strength, my hope

It brings light and meaning to my day

And the universe remains in sync

Let me love you baby and love me too

once as if in a dream

once as if a dream, still throbbing within my blood

your words walk through me

leaving their traces beneath my skin

leaving the rhythm of your syllables

in my blood

so that you echo with my pulse

you may think you have ghosted

away from me

but i hold your words

as I hold the wishes and wants

I offered, shared

dreamed with you

for you

I hold your words tight in my chest

sometimes ballooning with the heat you offered

we dreamed once together

and we now dream again 

I dreamed you

You carry away with you a reflection of me, a part of me. I dreamed you; I wished for your existence. You will always be a part of my life

she is my sea

people tell me there are many fish in the sea, 

I replied.....she is my sea!

helpless

There times when I need to speak

Let my love flow from my lips

My feelings bottled up inside

Yet it all seems to come out wrong

The lack of words or prose can’t describe

What I need to convey or have to say

I feel so helpless so far away

There are times I become afraid

Of things past and things to come

Fear lurks in the shadows it’s always there

Fear of loss pain and tears

Snatched away from my future dear

I see the struggle within your eyes

I am so helpless so far away

A love so strong it aches within

So pure and faithful loyalty too

It gives me strength when things are down

Brings me joy in sharing with you

A smile, a tear touches my heart

Always there to take your hand

I am helpless without your love

the space you reserve for me

The light captures you frozen in that moment

Immortal in time and space, poised

As radiant as the day and kiss of light

The diamonds sparkle in your hair

As the wind tussle’s it brushing

A picture of beauty

What lies within the immortal coil?

What drives and moulds it

Do shadows replace the warmth of light?

Withdrawing from its joy

Or kisses of folly kick at your heels

As you quietly skip along

It matters not what vision I see

The hue and blush upon your cheek

It’s what you hold in your heart

The space you reserve for me

More precious than all the gold created

That’s what matters, that’s what feeds me

consuming

A dominant man can never be alone,

I need to protect and care for what is mine,

I know that you need me

without you I cannot exist

my strength is not in my hands

but in my endearing love

my compassion for you

the tender moments are my strength

because my touch not only caresses your skin

but touches your heart and soul

you consume me as I consume you

we feed each other constantly

knowing you are mine

will always keep me near

you are my strength

you are the force that drives me

you are the joy in my heart

the song upon my lips

and the light that reflects in my eyes

you complete me